Like most human traits, too much of a good thing is often not so good. Being clean and tidy, for example, is fine; but taken to the extreme, orderliness and cleanliness can stymie one's ability to enjoy the other dimensions of life. The same can be said for timeliness, thriftiness, intellectualizing, exercising, being careful, spontaneity, planfulness... the list goes on.

I struggle with some of these tendencies myself (as those close to me will all too readily confess) so I speak from personal experience. Perhaps you have a more than passing familiarity with this, as well.

Perfectionism
Getting things done right, doing one's best, having expertise, and striving for accuracy and high quality are all laudable. In research, for example, accurate reporting of the facts, writing with clarity and precision, and being highly conversant with prior research and the direction the field is taking are all vital ingredients that result in valuable contributions to the field. Leave out any ingredient and the value is diminished.

Unfortunately, there is a line beyond which these same traits cause problems.  What does it mean, for example, to be highly conversant with prior research? What are the precise markers for writing with clarity and precision? How many ways and times must one check to see that the data are accurately represented?

Perfection, despite its downside, offers us something. For many of us, it offers the possibility that we don't make mistakes, that we don't have to deal with disappointment and criticism, whether from ourselves or others.  We don't have to "face the music"... or at least we can delay the inevitable. For others, it may be primarily based in avoiding the inevitability of moving forward, whether it's onto another project or another career.

I just assume that, like all the other addictions and habits that hinder us, we learned perfectionism way back, most likely in our childhood, and that it kept us safer or made our lives easier.  But whatever the cause, the question is, "What do we do to either dismantle it or work our way around it?"

Dismantling
Looking for the root cause, the source, the first episodes of an event, can give us insights to the dynamic behind any behavior. This is the answer often offered by psychotherapy, and it can be valuable.

Another way to dismantle it is to change your behavior first, then observe and deal with the experiences that come up. This is analogous to what would happen if you were attempting to change your eating behavior, for example. Choosing not to eat something that you didn't physically need to eat, you then get to "hang out" with your sensations, feelings, and thoughts. And, if you're very attentive and persistent, you get to discover how what these sensations really are like and what the ties are to your emotions, thinking, and behavior.  It is possible, then, to construct new links between your bodily sensations and your emotions and thinking that follow.  Obviously, this takes a hearty and sustained commitment.

Working Around It
There are so many things I do, think, and feel that I would prefer to change that I could spend all my time trying to "improve myself" just doing and never get to joyously live my life. So I choose to accept the preponderance of my idiosyncrasies and I find strategies and ways support myself to step around them.

Here are some of the most powerful actions you can take:

• Ask for support from friends, colleagues, and loved ones. Yes, you can actually do this. There is nothing quite like a loving nag to remind you to get moving. Do request that the call to action be offered in the spirit of support... and then be sure to accept it as the support it is intended to be. No cranky replies, please.
  
  
• Inform your colleagues of your perfectionist tendencies (as if they didn't already know).  
  
  
• Ask others to review your work.
  
  
• Partner up with others, preferably folks who don't share this particular tendency.
  
  
• Get help from a professional (that would be me... or some other coach).

Here are some less powerful, but very useful actions you can take:

• Set deadlines for when you will have something ready. Then send what you have by that time, or at least hand it to someone else to review.  If the reviewer gives you the thumbs-up, move on to the next project.
  
  
• Decide how many hours you will give yourself to ready your work. These are working hours, not clock hours, and doesn't include time you spend on other activities or unpredicted, but necessary activities which arose. Be generous when granting yourself these hours; later, it will be more difficult to lie to yourself that your estimate was far too low.  

Remember:

• Excellence is attainable; perfection is not.  You can make mistakes and still have produced excellent work.
  
  
• Consider that your research or writing is a work in progress. You don't have to have it be the "last word."
  
  
• Decide what you need in order to move through this. Then take steps to make it happen.
  
  

I love to hear from my readers. What other tips and nuances can you add to this topic?  

To your success -
   
  Steve